Finding the dream is possible if you believe.
Realistic versus Unrealistic
The reason is simple; the perfection you seek exists only in your mind. The dream is your reality, or put another way the reality is only a dream. And at this point you are only thinking about your dream. You have not committed yourself to knowing what your dream is, knowing what you want, knowing how to achieve it and knowing how to hang on to it. You are only at the thinking stage and likely thinking realistic.
Being realistic is the most common road to mediocrity. Why be realistic, what purpose is served by being realistic?
At one point in the past it was thought unrealistic to walk into a room and flip a switch and expect the light to come on. Fortunately, unrealistic thinkers like Humphry Davy, James Bowman Lindsay, Moses G. Farmer, William E. Sawyer, Joseph Swan, and Heinrich Göbel, who among others developed early and commercially impractical incandescent electric lamps did not think so. And later, Edison acting on what he perceived as the unrealistic expected lifespan of the lamp in existence, invented the first commercially practical incandescent light. Today, we can realistically expect the light to come on, but it is only due to the great thinkers who thought unrealistically.
Began to think unrealistic and decide that it will be done. Make the very moment you decide to do it - the moment it is done. See it done! See the finished product in your mind! You must believe in your goal. Yes, you must think unrealistically to find true success.
Living the Cliche
Today, the current thought is that it is realistic to believe that "you will only ever be as great as the people you surround yourself with", and that "you must be brave enough to let go of those who suggest that you can be happier." We are told that "if another person cannot accept us for who and what we are that they are not worthy of our companionship."
Those that believe in this will also tell you that "you shouldn’t attempt to live up to the expectations of those who see you as more than you are." There are those who try to make you realize that "you should stand your ground and be just as you are." That "if another wants you to change for the better that you should run away from that person as quickly as possible."
These same people that spread realistic attitudes as a holy grail, will also tell you that "if someone tries to make you feel uncomfortable with who you are right now and wants you to be better, that person is not even close friend material." And, "If someone makes you feel like you can’t be yourself - just the way you are today - that you shouldn't pursue a connection with him or her." They will tell you that "if you feel the least bit of anxiety that you should listen to your intuition and move on."
And they will tell you that, "there are so many 'right people' for you, who will accept you just the way you are, that it makes no sense to waste your time on them."
How many times have you been told these tired old cliches by your friends and family? How many time have you thought these yourself? Are you living your life by them, instead of using your own mind to come to decisions that are right for you?
These people are incorrect. If there are so many "right people" where are they and why have you not found your perfect match.
If we listened to them, we would be replacing our incandescent lamps each hour. We would never have put a man on the moon. We would have never had the Beatles who altered classical music to rock. We'd still be riding horses and living on the farm, scrounging a living from the dirt.
The thought that they spread only pertains to who they are and how they feel about themselves. You do not have to accept the behavior of others as your own.
Surrounding Yourself with Greatness
Let's think about this. If you spend all of your time with only great people and cast away those who are less, consider what group you are putting yourself in. You will spend so much time with these great people, trying to fit in, attempting to get them to accept and like you. You will study them, learn all you can about them, wanting to only hang out with them, and wanting to be just like them - one of the greats.
You will know this group of greats better than you know yourself. But, in the end, you have invested so much time with them - you don't know who you are.
You listened to others and positioned yourself into a group of God-like individuals who you must now be better than they. What are you setting yourself for? Failure! You will never be the greatest in a sea of greatness. You will constantly be striving to be better than everyone else, so that you can find your perfect match in the group.
As long as you follow others, the longer you are simply a mirror image of others. You will never be the best in a world of mediocrity. But, you can be the best that you can be.
The perfect match for you lies within you. And, once you find your true self and can stand proud that you are all that you can be in your own unique way, the better the opportunity of finding another that feels the same as you do.
Spend some time by yourself. It is necessary that you do not try to attain the goals of others if you want to live your own dream. When you become the right person, you will start separating yourself from other people. You begin to have a certain uniqueness. When you start running toward your own dream life takes on a special meaning.
Have you have been disappointed as you work towards your dream. Of course, you have!
It's hard work to follow your dream. Changing your life, from what others expect you to do and who and what you are may be the most difficult thing that you will ever have to do. Because in the process of working on your dreams you are going to incur a lot of disappointment, a lot of failure, a lot of pain. There will be moments when you doubt yourself, as you ask why is it that I am not happy? I want to be happy!
But that dream that you've been holding in your mind - is possible - if you believe that you can do it. Remember that Henry Ford said,
"Those who believe they can do something and those who believe they can't are both right."
Focus on Your Dream
When you are faced with hardships - you have to press on with your dream - don't give up. Hardships and disappointment will happen, but you do not have to accept them as the only solution. They will pass if you focus on your dream.
Often, we are our own worst enemy.
Most people stumble through life and accomplish nothing for themselves or others and they die. They never grow, they never work on improving themselves, they never stretching themselves to accomplish anything, and they never push themselves to greatness. They move through life complaining that they can't do something or anything, that they won't be able to accomplish even the simplest tasks, or that they don't know how to do something or how to get started. Yes, a lot of people like to complain, but they do nothing about improving their own situation.
Most people will readily admit that they don't work on their dreams. There is one basic reason for this. It is because of fear. The fear of failure when they ask, "What if things don't work out?" Or, the fear of success if it does work out, when they ask, "What if I can't handle it?"
Fearing the Fear Itself
The only thing you have to fear is fear itself - FDR
You are what is holding yourself back because either you or someone close to you that you believe in is telling you what your dream should be and how you should be just like them. That you should be just like them, because you know - misery loves company.
I can write this because I have not always been where I am today in my life. There have been many times when I have been my own worst enemy, when I was what was holding myself back because I was questioning myself or telling myself, “I can’t”.
For years, I told myself that, "I can't lose weight!" But I last year I lost 55 pounds in 6 months and I have managed to keep it off.
I told myself, "I can't be happy!" But, today I am happy and live a life of peace, serenity and tranquility, when a negative thinking person does not interrupt it.
The successful actor Will Smith said,
“You can't be scared to die for the truth. The truth is the only thing that is ever going to be constant. This is what I believe and I’m willing to die for it, period!"
No matter how bad it is, or how bad it gets, you can make it.
Replace I Can't with I Can
Allow me to give you a suggestion that has worked for me in the past. When I found myself thinking, "I can't" I asked myself this simple question,
"Okay, pretend for a moment that I could do this. If I could do this, what would it look like and what would the first step be to make it happen?”
The answer usually came to me quickly when I truly applied myself to finding the answer. Over and over I have removed "I can't" from my vocabulary and now I know that I "can do" anything that I want to do. Once you start with the assumption that anything is possible and work backwards from there, you will find yourself finding success over and over again.
I am not talking about things that you admittedly "shouldn't be doing." You need to understand the difference between “Shouldn’t” and “Can’t” to be most successful.
Never, ever tell yourself that you can’t do something. It kills the idea before you have given yourself a chance to succeed.
Every so often, you are presented with an amazing opportunity that seems too good. The common person would listen to the old adage, “If it seems too good to be true, it probably isn’t!”
On the other hand, what if it were true? If you are only common, you would never know and be left behind.
You see, it’s not believing in the adage, but whether you believe in yourself.
Trust yourself and not a tired old adage!
Learn to take risks and be your own cheerleader. It is important for you to believe in yourself, that you are the one person who counts most in your life. Find your true value and put it to work for you every moment of each day.
The People in Your Life
It is absolutely necessary to know that everyone won't see your dream as you see it. That everyone will join with you in your quest, or that others will have the same vision as you do. You are an uncommon breed of people that truly wants to work on your own happiness.
We cannot live in a vacuum. There will always be other people coming into and out of our daily life. The good news is that for the most part, we get to decide who most of these people are and how we will accept them into our lives. It is necessary that you align yourself with the right people and attract those right people into your life, who are hungry. People who are unstoppable and unreasonable. People who are refusing to live life just as it is, and want more. The people that are living their dream are the winners that you want to attach yourself to. The people, who are living their dream, are the people that know that if it is going to happen - it is up to them.
Investing in Yourself
If you want to be more successful, if you want to have something and do something you have never done before, you must invest in you. You have to believe that something different than what has happened in your past can happen.
Remember that being realistic is the most common road to mediocrity.
Someone's opinion of you or your methods does not have to become your reality. You do not have to go through life being a victim. And, even though you face disappointment, you have to know that within yourself that you can do it. Even if no one else sees it for you, you must see it for yourself.
I challenge you to invest the necessary time in yourself. I challenge you to live alone. I challenge you to spend hours getting to know yourself. When you become who you are, when you become the person that you were created to be, the person that you were designed to be, when you become an individual, when you start separating yourself from others.
I challenge you to go out on your own. Find a place where people don't know you, don't like you and you will find that people stop bothering you. Because you are not concerned with what makes them happy and can start concentrating on what makes you happy. You need to invest in yourself and your mind.
Have No Plan B
The first step, before anyone else believes it is that you have to believe it. There is no reason to have a Plan B, because it distracts from Plan A.
If you talk about your dream, if you continue to talk about your goal, then you have not done anything about it yet. Just take that first step. That you can touch millions of other people lives and the world would never be the same again. Because you came this way. Don't let others steal your dream.
Have we faced rejection before? Have we ever heard "No!”? Have we called a meeting where the other does not show up? Or had someone say, "You can count on me!" and they don't come through?
Your Redemptive Power
There is a redemptive power to making a choice, rather than accepting that you are simply an effect to all the things that others bring to the table. You must make a choice; just decide what it's going to be, who you are going to be, and how you are going to do it.
To have the level of success that you want to have requires focus. It will prove difficult if you spread it out and attempt to do multiple things at one time. It takes a desperate, obsessive focus with all of your heart, all of your fiber, and all of your creativity.
Understand that your universe exists to allow you to make things happen. Our thoughts, our dreams, our ideals are physical within the universe. If we dream something, if we can picture it, if we commit ourselves to something, there is a realization that we can make it happen. We do not allow situations in the world or other people to push us around. We are going to demand that our own universe become what we want it to become, not what others want us to become.
What if you have the kind of attitude that nobody believes in you? The light is cut off and you are left in the darkness. But, if you are still looking at your dream, reviewing it every day and moving forward you will succeed and come out a winner. Say it aloud - "It is not over until I win!"
You can live your dream!